Planning for the Hospital, a Move, or the End of Life

Consider an example: a home provider might ask, "What happens if I end up in the hospital, or worse?"

People often ask it with a half laugh, the way we talk about things we would rather not talk about. Underneath is a serious question. If you share your home, a change in your health affects the person living with you and your family, too.

Here is what to think through, what a written plan can cover, and where the law, not the plan, decides.

What to know

Health changes are part of life, and a home share can plan for them the way it plans for rent and quiet hours. The goal is that everyone knows what to do and who to call.

There is some experience to draw on. A UK homeshare program report found that 10% of home providers who died had someone sharing their home at the time, and 28% of those people stayed on to help look after the home during probate¹. That is one program in another country, with different laws, but it shows that these situations come up and can be planned for.

Some questions are legal, not personal, and a written agreement between the two of you may not settle them. The answer depends on your state. Here is what to ask:

• If I move to care or die, does the person living with me keep any rights to stay, and for how long?
• Who has authority over my home and the arrangement if I cannot make decisions: my agent under a power of attorney, my executor, or someone else?
• Should my will or other estate documents mention the home share?
• If I am in the hospital, should rent continue, and who can accept it?

Ask an elder law attorney or legal aid office. Your Area Agency on Aging can point you to free legal help for older adults². Probate and estate rules are set by each state, so bring these questions with you.

Why it exists

Few people like planning for illness or death, so it often goes unsaid. We put off the will, the advance directive, and the talk with family, and a home share becomes one more thing on a list we would rather not look at.

Without a plan, a hospital stay can leave the person you share a home with unsure whether to stay, whether to pay rent, or who to call. It can leave a family unsure who this person is and what was agreed. Grown children who live far away may arrive in a crisis and meet the person living in their parent's home for the first time. That is what happens when the plan lives only in one person's head.

Why it deserves respect

This is a practical question with real consequences for three sets of people: you, your family, and the person who lives with you. Raising it does not mean anything is wrong. It is the same instinct that leads people to keep a spare key with a neighbor.

It is also fair to decide that the planning feels like too much, or that you would rather not have anyone else's housing tied to your health. That is honest information, and it is a reasonable reason to choose a different arrangement.

What the evidence tells us

A short written plan answers some of the hard questions before anyone is under stress. When the decisions are made in advance, a hospital stay is less likely to turn into a crisis about the house as well.

Having another person in the home may mean someone notices sooner when something is wrong, but only if the two of you have talked about it. Agree on the specifics in advance, such as whether they should check on you if they have not seen you by a certain time, or whom they should call. Those are courtesies you agree to, not duties. Home sharing is housing. It is not caregiving, case management, counseling, or treatment. Trading help around the house for lower rent, or paying someone for help, can create employment, tax, and insurance obligations whether or not anyone intended it, so get advice before either of you agrees to it.

Ways to lower the barrier

• Add a contingency section to your agreement. Cover hospital stays, a move to care, and death. Keep it short and plain, and remember it does not replace what state law requires.
• Name a family contact or executor who knows about the match. Introduce them to the person you share your home with, even just by phone.
• Agree on timing, then check it. Write down how much notice the person living with you would get and whether rent continues during a hospital stay. Ask legal aid whether the law requires more.
• Keep roles clear. The person you share a home with should not be making medical or financial decisions for you unless you have chosen them for that role in legal documents. Those decisions belong with the people you name.
• Keep your own documents current. An advance directive, a power of attorney, and a will help the rest of the plan work. Call the Eldercare Locator at 1-800-677-1116 to find free legal help near you.
• Put a copy where it can be found. Tell your family contact and the person you share your home with where it is.

Conversation starters

If you are an adult child or friend raising home sharing with an older adult: - "If you were in the hospital, who would you want to be in touch with the person living with you?" - "Could I meet them, so we would know each other if anything ever came up?" - "If planning all this makes home sharing feel like too much, that's a fine answer too."

If you are an older adult talking with family or caregivers: - "I've written down what should happen with my home share if my health changes. Please keep a copy." - "The person I share my home with has your number, and you have theirs." - "We agreed on what happens during a hospital stay, and I asked a lawyer what the law adds."

A short written plan answers some of the hard questions before anyone is under stress.

Home sharing and older adults

Home sharing works at any age. Older adults are one of the fastest-growing groups sharing a home with someone who is not family³. At any age, planning for a health change is part of sharing a home responsibly.

Last reviewed September 25, 2026