Start With an Ordinary Saturday

Consider an example: asked to describe herself, a woman in her 70s says, "Oh, I don't know. I'm pretty ordinary." Asked what she did last Saturday, she talks for 10 minutes.

That is the whole idea behind this exercise. Most of us freeze when asked to describe ourselves, but almost anyone can describe a day. And for home sharing, a day is exactly what the other person needs to know about, because a day is what you would be sharing.

The exercise

Think about a typical Saturday. Not a special one, just an ordinary one. Answer these questions on paper, or have someone ask them and write down what you say.

• What time do you usually get up? Is the morning quiet, or is the radio or TV on?
• What might you do during the day? Are you mostly at home or out?
• Do you cook? Is the kitchen busy, or mostly used for coffee and toast?
• Do you watch television, listen to music, read, work in the yard, or fix things?
• Do you see friends or family? Do they come to you, or do you go to them?
• What does the evening usually look like? When do you turn in?

Then try the same questions for an ordinary weekday. If you work, volunteer, or care for someone, the weekday may matter even more.

What your answers tell someone

Here is an illustrative example, not a real person. A home provider writes down her Saturday:

"I'm up around 6. Coffee and the paper, then out to the garden if it's nice. I usually make soup or something that lasts a few days. My son and his kids come for dinner most Sundays. Evenings I watch a show or two and I'm in bed by 10."

She never used a single adjective about herself, but a reader now knows she is an early riser, fairly quiet, likes to garden, cooks most weeks, has family nearby, and has a calm evening routine. That is her profile. It just needs light shaping.

Share the pattern, not the schedule

Before you use your answers, read them once more with safety in mind. The details that make a routine vivid can also tell a stranger when your house is empty, when you are alone, or where to find you.

The rule is simple: describe your patterns, not your schedule or your places. Household rhythms, like being an early riser or turning in by 10, are useful and fine to share, because anyone living with you will notice them on day one. What to leave out is when the house will be empty, when you will be home by yourself, and the specific places you go.

• Instead of: "I walk at Laurelhurst Park every morning at 7."
  Try: "I'm an early riser and walk most mornings."
• Instead of: "I'm at 10 a.m. Mass at St. Anne's every Sunday."
  Try: "My faith community is an important part of my week."
• Instead of: "I visit my sister in Arizona every February."
  Try: "I travel to see family a few times a year."
• Instead of: "My son brings the kids over every Sunday at 5."
  Try: "Family visits are a regular part of my week."

The second version of each tells a possible match what they need to know about living with you. The first version tells a stranger where you will be and when. The specifics can come later, once you have met someone and decided to go further.

Now imagine sharing that Saturday

This is the part most profile advice skips, and for home sharing it may matter most. Go back through your day and ask:

Where would you enjoy having company, and where would you prefer your own space?

• Would you enjoy chatting over morning coffee, or is that your quiet time?
• Would you like someone to share a meal with now and then, or would you rather cook on your own schedule?
• Would you welcome help in the garden, or is that your time to yourself?
• How would you feel about someone else's friends or family visiting?
• Is the evening TV time something you would share, or a time you would rather have the living room to yourself?

Your answers here become the "how I live with others" part of your profile, and they are more useful than any description of an "ideal match." For example: "I enjoy friendly conversation over coffee, and I also value quiet afternoons. I'd be happy to share a meal now and then, but I don't expect to eat together every night."

SilverSingles, a dating site for people over 50, gives similar advice to people who enjoy a quieter pace: picture an ordinary afternoon you would actually enjoy with someone, rather than trying "to sound endlessly adventurous because other profiles do"¹. AARP's 2026 guide adds that differences in daily lifestyle become "more obvious, and more important" in our 50s and 60s². The same is true when you share a kitchen.

Staying safe as you get to know someone

Your Saturday is a description of your life, so treat it with care. Use the pattern rule above, then keep these steps in mind once people start reaching out.

Keep these off your profile. Your address or anything that points to it, the fact that you live alone, when your house is empty, the exact places you go and when, travel dates, health conditions, money matters, and details about your family. One test works for every sentence: does this help someone picture living with me, or does it help someone find me? Our guide "Honest, not everything: what stays off your profile" goes through the full list.

Get to know someone in steps. Each step lets you learn a little more before you share a little more.

1. Exchange messages through the site where you found each other, using your first name.
2. Talk on the phone.
3. Have a video call, so you can see that the person matches their photos.
4. Meet in a public place during the day, for an hour or less.
5. Meet again if you both want to, this time with your support person.
6. Only then, visit the home, with your support person there.
7. Before anyone signs or moves in: identity verification, a background check run with the person's written permission, references you call yourself, and a written agreement.

You can stop at any step, for any reason. "I don't think we're the right fit, but thank you for your time" is a complete answer.

Meet somewhere public. A library, a coffee shop, a senior center, a community center, or a restaurant at lunchtime all work well. Choose a place you know, with staff and other people around. Get yourself there and home again on your own, not in the other person's car. AARP's guide for people over 50 recommends meeting in public and keeping first meetings to under an hour².

Bring your own support person. HomeShare Online does not send staff to meetings or home visits, so plan who will be with you. Ask a family member, friend, or neighbor you trust. Tell them who you are meeting, where, and when, and call them afterward. For the home visit, have them there in person.

Know the warning signs. Pause and talk it over with your support person if someone:

• asks you for money, a loan, or help with an emergency, however convincing the story
• sends a check for more than they owe and asks you to send back the difference³
• wants to pay or be paid by wire transfer, gift card, or cryptocurrency
• pushes to move the conversation off the site quickly, or always has a reason they cannot talk by video or meet⁴
• asks whether you live alone, when you are away, or where you keep things
• asks for your Social Security number or bank details before you have both decided to move ahead
• hurries you, asks you to skip a step, or suggests you keep it from your family

Conversation starters

If you are an adult child or friend helping with this exercise:

• "Tell me about last Saturday, start to finish. I'll write it down."
• "Which parts of your day would you enjoy sharing, and which would you rather keep to yourself?"
• "Let's take out the times and place names before this goes online."

If you are an older adult talking with family or friends:

• "I don't want to describe myself, but I can tell you about my week."
• "Mornings are my quiet time. Anyone who lives here needs to be okay with that."
• "Would you read this and tell me if it gives away too much about where I'll be?"

Describe your patterns, not your schedule or your places.

Last reviewed September 26, 2026