The Golden Girls Model, in Real Life

For some older adults, the idea comes up half as a joke. For example, someone at book club or on a long phone call might say, "We should all move in together, like the Golden Girls." Everyone laughs, and for some people, there is a pause, because the idea has real appeal.

The appeal is not hard to name: someone to share dinner with now and then, someone who knows the same songs, a house that feels lived in. The catch is just as clear. A best friend may live across the country, may not be ready to move, or may simply prefer their own place. Living with someone you have never met is a very different idea.

Peer home sharing has real-world analogues. It will not recreate a television friendship. For some older adults, though, a carefully matched peer can be a comfortable way to share a home, with each person bringing something the other may value.

Why this matters

Older women, in particular, like the idea of sharing with a friend and are far more cautious about sharing with someone they do not know. In a 2024 AARP survey, 57% of women 50 and older said they would consider living with a friend as they age, but only 6% would consider living with a stranger¹. That gap is reasonable. A careful matching process is one way some people narrow it.

What it can look like

Programs across the country do this work. Sunshine Home Share Colorado, founded in 2016, made 31 matches in a recent year. It interviews people, runs background checks, verifies income, talks through lifestyle preferences, and helps settle disagreements after a match begins. About 55 home sharing organizations operate nationwide².

HomeShare Vermont takes its time. Its process includes multiple background checks, at least three reference checks for each person, 90-minute interviews, and a two-week trial match before anyone commits¹.

Here is an illustrative example, not a real match. A retired nurse, 74, has a three-bedroom house and a garden she no longer wants to keep up alone. Her match, 68, is a former school librarian whose rent went up by more than she could manage. They met twice at a coffee shop, then once at the house, and signed a written agreement covering rent, kitchen shelves, guests, and quiet hours. Two years later, they still disagree about the thermostat and still watch the evening news together.

What to know first

A peer match is one option, not an obligation. Being the same age is one possible basis for compatibility. Some people find they prefer a younger match, and some find they truly prefer living alone. Both are fine answers.

A careful matching process means the person is no longer completely unknown by move-in day. That comes from identity verification, references, background checks, several meetings, honest compatibility conversations, and a written agreement. None of it guarantees a good match, and you can still say no at any point before you sign.

Plan for aging at different rates. Two people in their 70s can be in very different places five years from now. Talk early about what happens if one of you has a fall, a surgery, or a diagnosis. Who calls family? Does the arrangement pause? When does it end?

Keep the line between housing and care. Home sharing is housing. It is not caregiving, case management, counseling, or treatment. Trading help around the house for lower rent, or paying someone for help, can create employment, tax, and insurance obligations whether or not anyone intended it, so get advice before either of you agrees to it. A ride to an appointment now and then is a courtesy between people who live together, not a duty.

Understand what a trial can and cannot do. Consider an initial trial period if permitted and structured appropriately under your local laws. A trial period does not necessarily override tenant or occupancy rights.

Write down how it ends. Your agreement can say how much notice each of you will give. That is a promise between the two of you. It does not replace any notice your state or city law requires, and the law may require more.

Ask about benefits. The answer depends on your state and your programs. Here is what to ask your benefits office or a free legal aid program: Will rent income affect my benefits? Does a shared household change my benefit amount? Do I need to report the arrangement?

Describe the home, not the person. A listing can say "quiet home near the library bus line." Wanting to live with someone your own age, or of a particular sex, can raise fair housing questions, and a preference is not necessarily lawful just because it is shared privately rather than in a listing. Before you describe the person you hope to share with, read our post "Choosing who lives with you, fairly" and talk with your program or a local fair housing organization.

How to get started

1. Find a program through the Eldercare Locator at 1-800-677-1116, which connects you with your Area Agency on Aging.
2. Ask any program or online matching service how it verifies identity, checks backgrounds, supports you after move-in, and handles the agreement.
3. Bring someone you trust to the first meeting, whether a friend, an adult child, or a neighbor.

Conversation starters

If you are an adult child or friend raising this with an older adult:

• "You light up when you talk about living with friends. Would you want to look at how a program handles it?"
• "You'd be the one choosing. Nobody moves in unless you say yes."
• "If we look into it and you'd rather keep the house to yourself, that is a fine answer."

If you are an older adult talking with family or caregivers:

• "I want company, not a caretaker. Someone my own age makes sense to me."
• "The program checks backgrounds and references, and I get to meet people more than once."
• "I may meet a few people and decide it is not for me. I'd like to find out."

A careful matching process means the person is no longer completely unknown by move-in day.

Home sharing and older adults

Home sharing works at any age. Older adults are one of the fastest-growing groups sharing a home with someone who is not family³, and they take part as both home providers and home seekers.

Last reviewed September 25, 2026